oh that nightmare thing
I dreamt about losing someone to a serial murder-rapist, and then being overtaken by the same individual. The dream spared me the details of what happens when you lose a fight with someone like that. The fight itself was terrifying enough in and of itself. I saw him coming, with a crazed look and a really phony premise of being a reporter or some shit. I couldn’t scream loud enough, and the few screams I squeaked out fell on no ears (or deaf ears). I fought, clawed, struggled, tried to run, and it wasn’t enough. The whole dream was steeped in the uttmost terror. Other featured emotions on the dream: piercing loss, bitter sorrow.
Before, or after that, I dreamt I had a huge argument with some woman about how wrong slavery was after watching a man and a woman escape wearing burlap rags. Maybe I was trying to distract her from going after the runaways, but either way I was adamant and livid.
The only thing I can think of is that this was some kind of intense emotional flush of my system. I’ve been angry, and sad, and terrified, and vulnerable. A lot of it was probably all in my head anyway. So I suppose something in my head triggered the flush valve and that was the process through which the rest of that residual emotional mess was purged from my system. There was otherwise no reason for such a thing. I do feel like everything is a lot lighter, and I don’t care if it’s just due to the vacation. The important part is I feel less like a psycho. That’s important. :)
Thanks are overdue to those supporting and/or putting up with me while I was handling myself poorly. :P I mean, I’m always sort of rude, but I’ve been extra rude and I apologize for that. If there are people I haven’t thanked or apologized to, I’m going to have to do so when I get home.
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