So I remember just enough of my dreams to merit writing them down. The reason I remember is because I was awakened by a combination of the cat scratching loudly at the door for breakfast, and the very last bit of the dream (which I’ll get to momentarily).
Going in list form because I don’t necessarily remember big details.
Several people were standing outside the mill building where I work, and I didn’t really recognize most of them.
I seemed to be viewing this through the eyes of a girl who was on the ground, but was also the “camera’s” focus at times.
People were throwing small objects on the ground with video game-esque results. Items like cherry tomatoes tossed to the ground to be mixed with something I think they called bitter acid. Where it then turned into 3 or 4 seperate items (one of which included a whole smaller tomato and a somewhat squished smaller tomato).
Girl-on-the-ground seemed to be our alchemist here. She also seemed to be captive by a large, angry, rather unattractive man.
It appeared she was voluntarily mute. She defied him by not giving him the right results of the tomato alchemy, or handing him something that wasn’t what he wanted.
Somewhere in here, she apparently felt as though she could make an escape, so she did. However, it appeared that at least one of her legs didn’t work so she was dragging herself as fast as she could by walking forward with her hands and dragging her body behind. (Which she was good at.)
Little moments betray that her legs do work, at least some of the time. It’s never understood why she doesn’t walk or run.
She flees across the bridge and over into the other part of the mill building, which seems to be part mill building and part fancy house… thing.
He is following inexorably behind, taking a kind of Pepe LaPew approach, quick but not so fast that she doesn’t have an opportunity to feel like she mgiht actually be able to hide somewhere.
A door looking like an understair (no stairs there, though) cabinet has a knob low enough for her to reach without getting up. She looks around for her pursuer, and not seeing him or hearing him close enough to tell for sure where she went, she drags herself quickly into the nook and shuts the door.
Despite a lack of lights it’s not totally dark in the cubby. She drags herself to the far corner, behind where the door opens into the space (even though I think she opened it outward) and gasps raggedly, trying to catch her breath and be silent at the same time.
Moments later the door opens inward, and his face slides in, turning immediately to face her in her corner.
A little fuzzy here but no force seemed to be used to extract her from the space.
Trying smaller doors within the cabinet revealed someone’s pantry to her.
Vauge confusing images of urban exploration type areas go here.
There was some kind of gathering to which both Ugly Guy and Crawling Girl were to attend.
There was a decent-sized audience, in a hotel conference room sort of setup, with fancy dinner chairs. I think it might have been a dress-up film affair.
People start smoking in the back of the room. This causes a wave of coughing to ensue and complaints to be issued.
At some point in all this, A HORRIBLE CLOWN MONSTER APPEARS! (FIGHT, ITEM, MAGIC, RUN)
People seemed to scatter. There was much mayhem. Some Beetlejuice-esque antics, with items turning traitor and scaring people witless.
Fuzziness here.
And of course, the last thing I remember before I woke up. The girl who had been dragging herself by her arms was bying taunted by this horrible clown beast. (Who was visible, invisible, in other forms, and generally everywhere at once, I might add.) He was trying very hard to make her afraid, weak and helpless. Part of what prevented him from attacking her outright was it seemed she needed to make a wish first. Once that wish was fulfilled, he would have his horrible, monstery way with her. Slowly, slowly she stood up on her own, trying to be steady and collect her thoughts.
Friends who had been run off the scene because the buggy thing they were in ran amok with them in it, finally came back on the scene after regaining some measure of control.
They arrived just in time to see the following:
The girl stammered “I wish… I wish… I wish…. I wish I’d stop saying I wish.”
Her eyes widened with horror, and frantically she searched about for help.
“NO! That wasn’t me who said that! He made me say it! He was moving my mouth!”
As she says this, the horrible (total Stephen King’s mini-series Tim Curry style IT) clown beast is revealed to indeed be holding her jaw, as he’s practically wrapped around her like a cloak.
These friends look on in horror, as the horrible clown monster pulls back his lips to reveal jagged, shark-like teeth, which he then sinks into the back of our heroine’s neck greedily.
(I seem to recall at some point there was a mention of it being more of a “mana” stealing, rather than a devouring, so this was more of a vampire type bite, chomping in to get the best blood flow going.)
Then I woke up and the cat was beating the crap out of my bedroom door. Then end.
(Edit: Despite being the “code” view, the wordpress post editor function still has WYSIWYG properties at times, like automatically inserting line breaks even if it means breaking apart an existing element incorrectly, as was shown above for a while. Should be all better now though! )
I don’t know about you but I love the fact that my friends listen to notably different stuff. It means more opportunities to discover new things. Also, what a great example of a simple chart indicating massive amounts of information.
If you can’t read that, and I don’t blame you if you can’t, it says “This Page Intentionally Left Blank” - which is to say that the second iteration of the Design-a-Vagina contest has come and gone without an entry. As such, I am somewhat grateful as it means I don’t have to shell out upwards of $150 on prizes, but I am also disappointed that I could not help the woman from North One who had encouraged me to rerun the contest in the hopes of fostering discussion on modern women’s body image issues.
Which is a subject that has been touched upon before by yours truly, although never really discussed outside of that post and mentions as part of the contest. Fun, games, and fabulous un-won prizes aside, are there any issues regarding elective cosmetic surgery and women’s body issues that anyone would like to talk about? If so, we would love to hear from you. No issues can be fixed or even identified unless they are understood, and understanding requires communication.
A clear and flagrant disrespect for all things was extruded from the two young men chatting back and forth on the mostly empty train car and left the air palpably unclean. Crisp suits, slick and greasy hair, shifty bright eyes, and utter animal stupidity were readily apparent upon a quick glance. Typical upper-class white boys with no sense of purpose beyond where their dicks will be by the end of the night or who they can roll under the bus to get the next raise. No love except the long-since-abandoned love for mother, and a lust for money and the status associated with it that they assume is love. Read the rest of this entry »
Perhaps the contest was simply too ahead of its time, perhaps it was simply released from the nest before it was truly ready to take to the skies. Whatever the case, the concept behind the contest did not go entirely unnoticed. I received a very positive communication from a woman from North One Television, who wrote in the hopes of finding out the results of the previous contest.
However, every day is another opportunity to turn things around. A documentary is being produced called “The Vagina Dialogues”. In the interest of reaching more people and getting people’s opinions on what the “visually ideal” vulva is like and people’s opinions on the things people do to achieve that ideal, we will be posting the details of the new, improved Design-a-Vagina contest very soon. Changes will include a more cohesive, thoughtful theme, and the presence of real prizes this time. Suggestions for prizes are welcome. In addition to submission-based prizes, we are also considering promotion-based prizes. (Suggestions for this portion are welcome also.)
Details on the documentary are below for those interested in getting a jump start on considering the overall theme of the contest.
In the last 5 years more and more women are choosing to have both aesthetic and reconstructive surgery. Surgeries such as vaginal tightening, labiaplasty and vaginal rejuvenation are being performed in NHS hospitals and in numerous private clinics around the country and this documentary aims to understand why women are becoming so concerned about the way they look and feel down there that they are resorting to plastic surgery.
Over the next few months our presenter will meet a number of people with differing views about vaginas – ranging from medical experts to mums and teenagers. She will look into how sex education is taught in schools, how men feel about women’s vulvas, how different cultures feel about vaginas and how over the past 20 years women’s perceptions of their bodies appears to have changed so dramatically - surely our grandmothers would never have considered having genital surgery?
We are very keen to address the issues that still remain taboo and make vagina-related topics not something to dismiss and laugh about, but a part of the body to understand, appreciate and admire.
This morning my mother copied to me via IM an email or a page she had found. Within contains the most complete list of paranoias, hoaxes, wishful thoughts, and general falderall ever generated via email chain letters. It is a tremendously entertaining read and I absolutely have to share with you all. Oh, and if you don’t digg, del.icio.us and put this on your facebook then bad luck and extreme misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for all eternity. Bill Gates told me so. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!
This is pretty cute and I thought you’d get a few healthy chuckles from it. :) I just want to thank all of you for your educational emails over the past year. Thanks to you, I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel. I can’t use the remote in a hotel room because I don’t know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels. I can’t sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed. I can’t enjoy lemon slices in my tea or on my seafood anymore because lemon peels have been found to contain all kinds of nasty germs including feces. I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pass-time while driving alone is picking your nose (although cell phone usage may be taking the number one spot) Eating a Little Debbie sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years. I can’t touch any woman’s purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom. Yuck! I must send my special thanks to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing. Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason. I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time. I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are se nding me for participating in their special e-mail program. I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa’s novena has granted my every wish. I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers. I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day. Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains. I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won’t crawl in my back seat when I’m pumping gas.. I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put ‘Under God’ on their cans. I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer. And thanks for letting me know I can’t boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face…disfiguring me for life. I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS. I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me. I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise. I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don’t support our American troops or the Salvation Army. I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a num ber for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda & Singapore and Uzbekistan I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe. Thanks to you, I can’t use anyone’s toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt. And thanks to your great advice, I can’t ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg. I can no longer drive my car because I can’t buy gas from certain gas companies! If you don’t send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your b ack, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor’s ex-mother-in-law’s second husband’s cousin’s beautician… Have a wonderful day… Oh, by the way….. A German scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse. Don’t bother taking it off now, it’s too late.-
Well, I’m just back from the first ever NH Media Makers get together. What a terrific idea, and what a great turn out. I honestly didn’t know what to expect, both in people or content, despite the post at the actual NH Media Makers site detailing who would be there and what to expect!
We had all types of people, with different disciplines, but the major unifying factor was our passion for all things internet. Which is extremely refreshing as a majority of people I’ve met here in New Hampshire have not been the slightest bit interested in the internet or tech in general. It was like a high school AV meeting with a million times more class.
After adamantly sucking down as much coffee as possible, I tuned in to each attendee’s introduction and background. Everybody had a great story to tell and a variety of really terrific projects they were involved in too. I don’t think a single person there had just one thing they were working on, interested in, or knew about. There was no shortage of great ideas, and everybody seemed tremendously passionate about their field of interest.
We had photographers, videographers, writers, entrepreneurs, search engine marketers, programmers, culture geeks, and often times most people were several of those things if not all of them! Had I been taking notes I’d have a lot more details about each person. Everybody I met was just terrific. There was a definite buzz in the air and I could tell a lot of really valuable connections were made. Separately we’ve got a ton of super ideas and talents, together we could really turn this area into a hub of internet and cultural activity.
Couple of points I want to shout out to any local readers:
One of the attendees is a film maker out in Manchester who will be looking for extras interested in dying. :)
Another wants to get interest up in late night monster movie showings in the area, preferably big screen. Who knows about theater in the area?
We’ve got film folks who might want extras, guest writers, feedback, or musical contributions/suggestions.
There are authors chomping at the bit for publishing tips or inspiration in general.
There’s me, looking for blog authors and people interested in helping my wacky friends commit some of their film ideas to the web.
There’s a niche marketer looking for ideas and feedback on how to incorporate things like video and blogs into his repertoire to strengthen his position as the top in his field(s).
And so much more. I’m hoping others took better notes. There will be a mailing list, and notes and attendee URLs will be posted over at the NH Media Makers site, so stay tuned. We’ll also have some pictures and video courtesy of a few folks who were there. (Phil, John, and Roger if I remember correctly.) There will be more of these in the future, so if you missed the first one, fret not, you will have a chance to join in the fun!
Nothing makes you think harder about the quality of your life than having the shits. Truly. Nothing gives you more pause for thought than when your colon is doing things you know damn well it oughtn’t do at all. Read the rest of this entry »
As you may have noticed, with the advent of automatic updates via Twitter and del.icio.us, yours truly has gotten rather lazy about posting things that you, gentle reader, would find interesting, delightful, or thought-provoking.
This upsets me possibly more than it upsets you, because after all no one likes to feel like they’re shirking their most important duties. The particularly astute may notice that I have taken the author count on the side bar from 4 down to 1.
I feel as though I will be much less inclined to badger my friends into producing material for this website if I do not count them as “authors”. In my mind, an author on this blog should be committed to posting something original at least once per week, if not more often. I barely make this quota myself at times, and would by no means wish to start imposing it on others. Therefore I have decided that they are welcome to contribute at any time, but will only have the burden of being considered an author should they desire it.
That said, I am looking for a few good creatures who can type, who would like to contribute or be a full-fledged author. It’s not a job, I cannot pay anyone for writing here, not even myself. It is purely voluntary. As you may have noticed there really isn’t much of a theme going here. Pretty much any subject goes. Those highly prone to inflammatory remarks, spamming, and being generally hateful need not apply. We here (and I guess at this point it’s the royal “we”) at RKNet are fans of chaos, but not of wantonly pissing off others for no particular reason. What say you, any takers?
Some kids play in the sandbox. We play in the.... litterbox??? The RKNet staff is pleased that you decided to stop by. Currently this is a 1 author project, with periodic guest posts. Contact giania [at symbol] gmail.com if you'd like to play here to.
