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I’m So (Not) Lazy

Giania — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 20:48:50 +0000

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Crystal, author of Big Bright Bulb, is an amazing woman. She’s vibrant, she’s forthright, she’s clever and inspiring.

Lately she touched on a subject that’s been near to the surface of my mind and a thorn in my heart: Laziness.

There is often so much in life that needs to get accomplished, and if you aren’t accomplishing those things, you’re a lazy, awful, no-good, very bad person, right?

Well, no. Not really, but it’s very easy to get sucked into that feeling, and into feeling that way about others when you see they aren’t getting much done either.

Crystal rightly frames what we call “laziness” as a more like being “stuck” and as a symptom of another (sometimes larger) issue. Below is her list, and beside each item: all the ways I can own up to the fact that I may not have excuses, but I have reasons for not being a perfect Doing machine all the time.

Laziness is a symptom of being—

in Mourning - In 2007, my father died of a heart attack. There’s a lot about that I’m still coming to terms with, and I miss him every single day.
in Recovery – I spent some time drinking on an almost daily basis. I didn’t stop entirely – I’m not on the proverbial wagon – but in the last 4 months I think I could count the number of drinks I’ve had on one hand. That said, my body still tells me sometimes that it’s tired from the hard times I put it through.
Angry – There are just too many things that make me angry to even list. I can tell from that statement alone that I’ve got some things I need to take care of.
Exhausted – I can’t seem to get un-tired sometimes it seems. There’s a lot to do and when I set myself to it, I can’t be stopped. This unfortunately sets me up for some nasty self-care habits that leave me wiped out.
Embittered – I feel cheated by foul circumstances that seemingly have no end. I feel used by those who leverage my patience to delay giving me my dues.
Dehydrated – Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. What’s water?
Depressed – It’s a compound of everything, really.
Demotivated – (Distinct from unmotivated.) I’m going to get treated poorly and still be expected to perform? Uhh…
Disorganized – I’ve moved living spaces and hopped computers a couple of times in recent history, and I can’t. fucking. find. anything anymore. It’s maddening.
Distracted - The internet is full of shiny things I can care about, or pretend to care about.
Disappointed – I live and work with adults. Sometimes, that sentence is very hard to believe.
Conflicted – I could continue to take care of my family, but I know that comes at a serious cost to my relationship with my significant other… and with them, but I can’t not help, can I?
Undernourished - See previous mention of poor self-care habits.
Uninspired – I’m not so sure about this one. If anything, I’m over-inspired to the point I can’t seem to find a thing and run with it.
Unwell – My allergies have been plaguing me constantly.
Unmotivated – What incentive do I have to fix everything life throws at me? I mean honestly. Some of these things aren’t even mine to fix in the first place, and that’s just the damn truth.
Uncentered – I barely know which way is up half the time, yeah. Sense of self? Shaky at best.
Unfocused – Priorities are numerous and hard to get into line. It makes it easy to stare at all the different tasks like a magic eye picture in the vain hope they’ll take shape. (And I never could do those magic eye things.)
Undercommitted – It’s well known that there’s a lot of “stuff” I have to do, but just what that is feels like it’s mutable, and it’s hard to hold myself accountable to a goal of “STUFF”.
Overwhelmed – Yes?
and maybe just a little low on Mojo – Extra large with a cherry on top, please.

So, in short I may be abused, tired, neglected, overwrought, underappreciated, over-committed, unimpressed, heartbroken and scatterbrained, but the one thing I am not is LAZY.

With all that in mind, when things fall by the wayside and I can’t seem to get things done, maybe it’s time I stop punishing and hating on myself for being lazy and start working smarter, and not harder. Crystal proposes several things that work for her. All those resources look fascinating, but it’s up to each of us to find our own path back to… well, back to whatever it is that “lazy” isn’t.

And I suspect the only way to do that is one positive acknowledgement and reward at a time.

Today’s positive acknowledgement? That I have all these bad feelings and things in my life, but I am not merely the sum of all those bad things, and my reward for that acknowledgement will be a big, deep breath and a night’s sleep that isn’t bookended by guilt for all those bad things.

Then tomorrow we’ll try for breakfast… and see what I can do from there. :)

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Vermilion Pleasure Night

VKlaus — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 01:03:02 +0000

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You know those old videos that were all the rage back in the day that were about playing classical music overtop of bright and colorful things that were supposed to make an army of super intelligent babies but actually did more to develop ADD than anything resembling intelligence? Well “Vermilion Pleasure Night” is sort of like that for the Young Adult Fetishist.
Lots of bright colors, lots of cute girls in outfits that would give any fashion aficionado a rock hard erection, awesome music, and some bizarre comedy.

I remember seeing the trailer for this a long time ago in my early pubescent days of reading Newtype Magazine and being intrigued. At the time I was into manga and anime in a bad way. So anything that the magazine told me was good I wanted with a passion. It also promised boobies, which at the time would have also worked.

But as things go I never got around to buying it and I eventually forgot it. However the other day I was browsing through Netfilx streaming catalog and found all of the episodes were available for instant watch. So looking for a chance to wax nostalgic I Queued it up and let it go. I was not entirely prepared for what I got.

The music, they style, and on rare occasion the comedy and satire were fantastic! I was racking my brain as to why this wasn’t more popular. I thought “This crazy Japanese random crap is exactly what weeaboo otaku eat up!” But then I realized, the reason it was not popular is because its not “Japanese” really.

The animation style that it uses are far from anime and the closest I could compare it to is Heavy Metal but even then still not quite right. The music isn’t girl pop sang by frilly pop idols. The clothing, while ridiculous, is not made of lace, no latex tutu’s, no maid outfits, and the nurses are far from this. What’s more, it’s not trying to be wacky or crazy its trying to be legitimately different and I applaud them for that.

The problem that arises is that it’s a fairly repetitive show . Skits repeat often and a lot of the time the humor of the running gags don’t come across very well. Two recurring skits that I kind of hate are the Fuccons, who got their own spin off show and did fairly well in America, and Zombie Family which takes too much time and is boring even if the make up looks rad. By the third episode in a row I was just fast forwarding though them as quickly as possible to get to the good stuff.
At times the show tries to satirize Japanese family sitcoms which sometimes you can kind of see how it could be funny but it generally fails. What’s worse though, is when it tries to satirize art films. Sometimes it does alright but most of the time it just becomes difficult to tell if it’s a joke or if its being serious.
But all of that doesn’t put me off that much. I still enjoyed a lot of it. Watching pretty things, listening to dance music, and clapping my hands like the super intelligent infant I truly am.

I would suggest, if you can, watch the first two episodes then give yourself a break. I was up till 3 watching all five episodes back to back and I’m sure my brain slowly leaking out of my nose.
But there is always something cool and new to be seen in every episode but a lot of each episode is repeated skits or more goddamn Fuccons.

Keep a look out for:
One point English
Midnight Cooking (specifically the one where she has the shakes)
Zipper Girl
Quick Girl
Hot space ladies playing in pink goo.

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Learning and Reimagining the Tarot: First Card – The Hanged Man

Giania — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 07:14:49 +0000

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This first card was challenging. Back on the 13^th, when I first set down my intentions for this project, I thought I had a pretty good idea of what I wanted to do. I spent the next ten days reading things, assimilating concepts, arguing with myself, and cutting up magazines with the thought of doing a “real” art project using physical materials.

Even when I sat down and admitted to myself that I was not going to find what I wanted in the piles of magazines to create something meaningful, nor would my drawing fulfill my vision, I encountered uncertainty and hesitance. What was the most important thing I could say or depict on this card? Did the image mean the most, or would words be the order of the day?

Ultimately I ended up with something that I feel as though I’m happy with. There is still a lot to learn about this card, and I may revisit and revise it as I understand more about the intimacies of meaning contained within this set of gnostic guideposts.

Click the image to download the full size PDF version of this card. Note: It is a 1.9mb file!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/ajawin/ / CC BY 2.0

Tarot and Qabalah: A Two-Fold Guidebook

At first glance, scholars of the Tarot and its relationship with the Qabalah may rush to correct my association here. In the Golden Dawn’s depiction of the Sephiroth[img], The Hanged Man corresponds to the path leading between Geburah and Hod. I am using the reformed Tree as outlined by Donald Tyson in the essay The Gate of Daath1. In this essay he outlines changes to the positioning and numbering of the paths based on the idea that Yesod is the only realistic path into the tree from Malkuth2, as well as establishing the need for paths connecting Binah-Chesed and Chokmah-Geburah3. (He has not published the diagram for this tree on his site, nor did I find another image elsewhere. Out of respect for the publisher’s request at the beginning of the book, I will not reproduce this diagram here unless I am given permission.) This corrects the Tree for the notion that the moon (Yesod) has always been the gateway to higher planes of consciousness, as well as creating the “x marks the spot” location for Daath on the upper portion of the Tree, similar to the positioning of Tiphareth below. Although this may realistically change many of the associations, I am currently running under the assumption that since The Hanged Man maintains position as corresponding with Path 23, that the tables provided by 7774 still hold true.

Getting to the card itself, I opted here for a two panel system, very much in line with the iconic layout provided by long-running CCG, Magic: The Gathering5. Looking again at their layout, I can already see areas in which I can improve the structure of my cards to convey more information more cleanly, but results of these thoughts will be explored another time.

The top panel is an image which I feel befits the original artistic depiction of the card. The caption provided by the artist is equally fitting and moving.

I can wait…
… says the little voice.
I close my eyes, try falling asleep, try not seeing him, his pesky presence. Try not hearing his never-ending questions.
Who says I have to answer EVERY question? Who says it has to be NOW? And why me? I am falling behind, at best of times feeling like I am about to catch up. But most of my time – I am just repaying old debts.
The spotlight dims and darkness descends. Precious sleep.
But should I wake up, without omission, here he is! Ta-dah!!!!! The little powerful voice and his army of questions.
“Not now”, I say.
“I can wait” he says, from his timeless space.

From the original flickr photo page.

This story unknowingly ties perfectly into the concepts fueling The Hanged Man, regardless of which side of the Tree you are exploring. It is characterized by Ordeal, by rite of passage and confrontation of that which would rip asunder our assumptions. On the back side of the tree, this would mean blindly surrendering to ignorance. On the front side, it is a willful sacrifice of old beliefs, resulting in enlightenment. Tiphareth is sort of a mid-way point in the tree, still exalted in its own right, but by no means the end of the journey. This route (on the front side) bypasses Tiphareth entirely, though I would argue that its enlightening end results are brimming with Tipharethic energies. Likewise on the night side of the Tree, The Hanged Man catapults himself headlong into the Abyss, bypassing any attempt for reform or redemption that is offered by Daath’s position at the center of the criss-crossing paths that makeup the middle of the upper tree.

Characters Fitting This Card

Here I outline a few characters – fictional, mythological, and otherwise – whose stories have examples of the transitional energy of The Hanged Man. It’s a fairly small and obvious collection. I’d love to come up with a few more examples of both the day and night sides of the tree.

Cecil (Final Fantasy 4)

Although he was victorious in many ways as a Dark Knight, he couldn’t fulfill his quest until he learned to be merciful and accept the ways of the Paladin. This is a very overt example of ordeal leading into redemption, and enlightenment.6

Odin

In return for hanging upon Yggdrasil for nine nights, Odin received the knowledge of runes7. A clear example of the concepts at work in The Hanged Man.

Jesus Christ

Directly noted in the correspondence tables of 777, Jesus is possibly the quintessential archetype for sacrifice resulting in ascension to higher power.

Any Death-Rebirth Deity

As argued here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life-death-rebirth_deity, citing Jung’s claim that death and rebirth are archetypal processes. A theory supported by other researchers of myth.

Ikari Shinji (Neon Genesis Evangelion)

Rife with gnostic symbolism and modern angst, Evangelion can and will burst your mind at the seams with all the concepts it tries to throw at you. At the end, Ikari Shinji is submitted to sacrifice and is reborn in a strange new world. I submit that his case would be a good example of the Qlippothic journey into dark supernal Binah, as his was always a path of despair and denial.

Final Thoughts

There is so much to learn here. I barely scratched the surface of the correspondences, especially the intense association with water and watery deities and concepts. Lotuses, nymphs, and the lord Poseidon all by the wayside while I figure out what it all means. The animal associations present their own puzzle: what do eagles, snakes, scorpions, beetles, lobsters, and wolves have to do with The Hanged Man?

What will the next card be? I have no idea. I will not draw another card until after this is published and another day dawns. When will it be published here? Again, it depends on the card and candidly on my life in general. Until then, I invite comment and question!

Resources:
1. Tyson, Donald The Gate of Daath, Howlings (Scarlet Imprint, 2008) 133.
2. Ibid, 129-130
3. Ibid, 131
4. Crowley, Aleister, 777 vel Prolegomena Symbolica Ad Systemam Sceptico Mysticae (courtesy hermetic.com, PDF)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_the_Gathering for general history & images or the Getting Started Guide on Wizards of the Coast’s site for a full breakdown of how a card is constructed.
6. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Fantasy_IV#cite_note-14 or FF IV original (Japanese) & English script: Mt.Ordeals
7. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yggdrasil#H.C3.A1vam.C3.A1l

Supplementary Resources:
http://www.servantsofthelight.org/QBL/Paths/23_mem.html An HTML table rendering of all the data of line 23 of 777.

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A New Breed of MMO Is Born

The Evil Genius — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 19:10:42 +0000

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Well, perhaps not yet “born” yet, per se, but it’s definitely somewhere in its second trimester and we have gotten quite a clear ultrasound at this point of NETdevil’s high concept sci-fi space shooter MMOG, Jumpgate: Evolution. While the game is currently in a solid alpha-build stage, what we’ve been allowed to see thus far has been impressive and looks to be a innovative and creative addition to a pair of suffering genres, namely the Space-Simulation and MMORPG genres, to be precise. With the last great space sims being as far back as 2005’s X3: Reunion or 2007’s Spaceforce: Rogue Universe (although nothing has been able to quite top Microsoft’s 2001 opus Freelancer in this gamer’s opinion in terms of sheer playability or longevity -- Freelancer has been kept very much alive to this day by an active modding community and several privately run multiplayer servers) and space-based MMO’s being rather nonexistent with the exception of CCP’s EVE Online and the general MMO market at large being dominated by Blizzard’s powerhouse World of Warcraft, both species of games seem to need a little something to come along and breathe some new life in.

There’s no way to accurately discuss Jumpgate: Evolution (or JG:E if you don’t like typing out entire words) without mentioning it’s 2001 predecessor Jumpgate: The Reconstruction Initiative (or JG:C for Jumpgate Classic), a PC MMOG that first brought the infinite vastness of space to the massively multiplayer genre. JG:C featured several unique ideas that helped it find it’s niche upon release, the most notable being the “Newtonian” space flight physics, essentially meaning that piloting your spacecraft was alot like, as one JG:E wiki editor put it, driving on ice, accurately simulating what it might be like to steer a ship in a vacuum with no gravity. It’s a bit tough to explain, but basically don’t expect to make any 90 degree turns at high speed and it can take up to two full kilometers to go from full throttle to a complete stop. Unfortunately, JG:C was plagued by a steep difficulty curve and sub-par graphics (even for it’s 2001 release), however it’s creative approach to space flight have given it an active user base to this day despite an overall lack of traffic that led to the merging of what started as several servers into one “global” server. Now, enough about the past. I’d first heard of JG:E through a few web forums while looking for something prettier to replace Freelancer as my main “blow shit up” space sim, and upon viewing their official website at www.jumpgateevolution.com, I was forced to run to my kitchen to grab a hand towel to stop the constant flow of drool.

It’s clear that JG:E won’t suffer from it’s predecessor’s fugly graphics. Also, it’s graphically scaleable to run on systems as small as 800MHz processor and 32MB of video memory - without pixel shaders.

JG:E’s lead creative director Hermann Peterscheck has been quoted as denouncing the design decisions of games like EVE Online in which space is dark and empty (and, in EVE’s case, repetitious and actually quite boring) by saying that “space should be beautiful”, and by God, is it ever. JG:E’s high-contrast and colorful vision of space makes for intense eye-candy and serves as quite an immersive backdrop for the games action-based play system… and by action-based I mean that JG:E provides innovation by throwing away the character classes and pen-and-paper style dice rolls for hit chance and damage persistent though every successful MMO to date in favor of a “twitch based” live combat…so basically this MMO will be based more on player skill rather than how much time you have to repeatedly farm Karazhan for the leetest gear for your class. That’s right, no action bars, no skill trees, no lengthy cool downs, just frantic reticule-based shooting and real-time dogfights. Player skill is even required for tasks such as docking your vessel at a station, a procedure during which player ships must approach at the correct angle and velocity to physically pilot their ship into a station’s docking bay.

I’ll be sitting, parked and giggling as I watch newbie pilots crash into stations like these while learning to properly dock.

The flight model found in JG:E will be a reworked version of the JG:C physics described above, allowing for full vessel control including pitch, roll and yaw, with thruster control allowing for the obvious forward thrusters and afterburners as well as strafing thrust for left, right, up and down. JG:C’s Newtonian flight physics are in full effect, allowing players to slide around targets and even fly backwards, however this time there is a switchable “inertial dampener” system in place that give things a more “arcade-like” or “stickier” feel for novice pilots or pretty much anyone that needs to do some tight maneuvering, and given JG:E’s wide array of diverse locales containing hazards such as dense asteroid belts or disused ship foundries (rife with broken-down husks of massive capitol vessels), it’s this gamer’s opinion that you’ll find yourself switching them on and off pretty regularly depending on the current terrain you need to navigate. Another solid win in the control department is JG:E’s full support of analog joysticks and HOTAS (hands-on-throttle-and-stick) flight control setups, allowing for an incredibly genuine and totally immersive experience.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4AjNRdmMJ0

JG:E demoed on a Saitek X52 HOTAS system. You may want to mute the music.

While the details of the character creation system are still firmly placed under wraps by the developer, it is known that players will be divided into three separate factions: the industrious yet corrupt Solarian Commonwealth, the firmly religious Quantar Paths and the militaristic Octavian Empire, with several NPC-only factions like the secretive Hyperial Protectorate, the technologically advanced Anamath (believed to be extinct), the overtly hostile Conflux and a pirate faction known only as The Infernals. Each faction hails from a separate section of space and feature, yep, you guessed it, even more eye-candy in the form of highly varied star system design and vastly different tech. These three playable races set the stage for some interesting PvP and RvR action in the form of open-world Player vs. Player skirmishes as well as instanced battles based on flag capturing games and, my personal favorite, a squad based “destroy the other team’s battleship” game who’s name implies that it’ll be simply…intense. As for RvR (or Realm-vs.-Realm, a concept known well to Dark Age of Camaelot and Warhammer Online players), players will be able to seize control of sector control bases in contested systems, claiming that system for their faction and gaining themselves and their compatriots certain bonuses while in the sector until the base is either destroyed or assaulted and reclaimed by an opposing army. Another original gameplay mechanic devised for JG:E is called “soft grouping” where multiple players engaging the same hostile target will gain experience and loot regardless of whether the participating players are “partied”. This simple idea shines in the fact that it subliminally encourages comradery between players through rewards…I can’t even count the times that I’ve had to watch my character in WoW get crushed by an NPC monster as members of my own faction simply run past without so much as a second glance or even an offer for assistance, or alternatively having quest-related creatures “ninja-ed” from my party by members of my own force.

Large-scale fleet engagements await you in the universe of JG:E.

Thus far, NETdevil has been allowing information regarding this unique title to trickle from their offices at a painfully slow rate, with even the release date slated to an ambiguous “Q1 2009” with a closed beta launching “sometime soon” (The beta can be applied for on their official site -- although with keys being doled out in clusters of 1000 and nearly 150,000 applications as of mid-November the chances of getting into the closed beta are slim at best). From what we’ve seen so far, JG:E is shaping up to be possibly the best new MMO released in some time. Combining furious action with RPG style progression and some impressively realistic space flight, Jumpgate: Evolution gets my vote as THE title to watch for in the coming months. Look for my forthcoming full review either a few weeks after the game launches, or earlier if I can finagle my way into the beta. For more information, visit their official site at www.jumpgateevolution.com or their meticulously updated wiki at www.jumpgateevo.wikia.com.

I’ll leave you with an in-game footage reel to wet your space battle appetite. Enjoy.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cX491A9aLk

Note: Thanks to IGN.com for hosting a whole ton of images with handy-dandy embedding HTML.

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Don’t Stop At Your Television – Throw Away Your Whole Tech Life

Guest Author — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 22:07:40 +0000

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Here’s a little social experiment: Erase your MySpace page. Go ahead, you’re going to have to trust me on this one. And while you’re at it get rid of your Facebook page as well. Right now, I’ll wait. Also delete your LinkedIn profile and take yourself off of Match.com, Friendster, and Classmates.com. Peekyou, Flickr, and Twitter – all gone. Next, walk over to your window, open it up, remove the screen and collect the following items: PS3, XBox, Game Cube, etc. Toss ‘em right out that sucker. Cell phone? iPhone? Google phone? Yup, toss those out the window too. Just for good measure, if you are one of the last few still harboring a landline, might as well detatch that. And finally – this one is going to hurt – haul that television over to the window and let that big guy fly. That’s right, no more cable, no more HBO, no nothing.

DISCLAIMER: RKNet Blog is not responsible for any lost or damaged items resulting from this experiment, or injuries resulting from falling personal items.

So at this point you may be wondering what the purpose of all this is. I assume most of you readers wondered this before you removed your self from all connections between you and your friends, family, and business associates and threw thousands of dollars worth of electronics to the streets below. Well, the reason for this experiment is twofold. First, if I see one more commercial with that smarmy, coy douche bag, Dan Hesse I am going to devote the rest of my life to Durden-esque system-fighting. And two, the everyday life of too many Americans has become so crammed full of distractions that the important things in life are now self-obsessed, masturbatory (side note: “masturbatory” has actually been proven to be the funniest word in the English language, so go ahead and chuckle despite the seriousness of this topic) functions solely aimed at attention whoring or money grubbing.

Certainly one could blame poor parenting for creating generations of fickle minds and self-centeredness, but that’s a whole different conversation with sociological implications I am not currently prepared to address. What I do know however, is that I have watched plenty of television and felt the depraving addiction to lame TV programs. I have participated in social networks and felt the emptiness of wondering what strangers think of me. I have texted people for no reason, drunk dialed, and entertained other desperate attempts at pointless neediness.

“Hey, wait just a second,” you readers may be protesting at this point, “if you have detached yourself from social networks, communications devices and other mind-numbing electronics, what are you doing writing for a blog??” Very good question, dear reader. The unfortunate truth is I cannot do all of these things. (I tried by abandoning television and video games, which was a big step but ultimately trivial when compared to the lot of things I could not remove from my daily life. I also rationalized that ignoring people’s calls was like not having a cell phone, but it’s not.) This is why I need you all to carry out this experiment for me – for all of us.

It is my dream that one day I will be able to disconnect from everyone and from everything. I would urge everyone to at least consider it – if only temporarily, or only just a little. I have even considered moving to places that do not embrace a culture of television, do not have as much accessibility to internet, cable, cell phone towers, etc. Not only is it healthy, but I think it’s the only way to avoid a zombie apocalypse.

In this case I am using the term “zombie apocalypse” to refer to the very real possibility of the world ending at the hands of superficial morons, or as I like to call them, zombies.

There are of course many logical arguments against abandoning such useful devices as telephones, televisions and computers like,

“How am I supposed to communicate with the ones I love?”

“What if something important happens somewhere, I will have no way of knowing.”

“I may be left unprotected during emergencies.”

and other such fit-for-emo-song complaints. Well these are real concerns, but the true pessimist will see the benefit right away. A true realist will come around eventually. And you optimists have fun seeing how many friends you can horde on Facebook while civilization crashes down around you.

My point is that I cut out television from my normal life and felt better immediately – healthier, happier, so on. I also recognize my addiciton to attention through social networks and through cell phones and email, and it makes me feel dirty. I will even go so far as to say that I felt like a more genuine person before I got wrapped up in the tsunami of mass communication that is rapidly forming a global society. Too much staring at screens will drain you physically and obsession over image will drain you mentally, perhaps even change you. That is why I am warning those of you who may share my experiences. Get out now, while you still can.

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New Features: Google Friend Connect and Movie Reviews

Giania — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 13:02:22 +0000

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Hi friends!

We just added some Google Friend Connect features that will allow you to publicly declare your RKNet fandom. GFC supports login/signup via Google accounts, Yahoo! accounts, OpenID credentials or AIM signin info. Right now you can add RKNet as a favorite site using this feature, link to us via Facebook, Myspace, etc and invite others in your contact list to be friends of the site too (which wouldn’t hurt our feelings any).

The 50th person to become a member through Google Friend Connect is going to get something special. The member sign up is on the home page: randomkitty.net – and there’s also a login/signup mini-box in the upper right portion of the sidebar on the blog home page.

Soon as I figure out what I did wrong before, we’ll use this service to offer more feedback options (starred reviews of articles being the big one), and eventually we might find or build a few custom gadgets for you to play with when you visit.

Also, I just got finished going through my Blockbuster online account and I pulled up my rental history to share with everyone. I listed each movie, when it was rented, and some short notes about each film. If I get ambitious I may start doing the same thing with my physical film (DVD) library. Anybody know of a fast way to catalog stuff like that? Hit up the comments and lay it on me, man.

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Dream Log: Zombies, Volcanoes and… Weekly Geek??! Bonus Dream: Lovecraftian Time Travel Disaster

Giania — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 03:26:44 +0000

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Inside a vast, dim tent, shuffling undead awaited. Their dark bones smoked amethyst in the shaky torchlight, their shredded rags regal crimson. Confident and communicative undead of unknown ages. I warned them not to leave the confines of the tent but they muttered their excuses and went into the savage desert sunlight outside. They were able to return after all. Zombies created zombies and were happy about it, though these were fleshier than their originally dry, empty skeletons of before. What we spoke of I don’t remember.

The campsite was around a stand of old trees on a hill. The ground was dry and grass was sparse. A lounge tent of mostly mesh was set up, all the comforts of home scattered within. Then in the distance, a thick plume rose up from a hillside sparking with glittery orange and red.
Sparks reached us before the smoke and we scrambled, looking around to account for everyone, to grab up survival gear only to pile into the vehicle to go somewhere, anywhere away. The campsite was on a hillside near some broad, tall trees and the large homey tents were all set up and comfortably arrayed with everything you’d want for a week-long sojourn into fresher climes. We felt a rumble and looked down. The city below spread out in the valley, a wave of monochrome bar graphs all jumbled together, and the hills along the other side rising gently in the west. As if Hephaestus had brought his hammer down to temper the land, a massive gout of ash and raging sparks appeared with alarming quickness, and soon another smaller cloud rose from the heart of the city scape below. Looking about in dazed alarm we felt the earth sink and shift beneath our feet. A massive old tree beside me sudden lit up from within, the deep fissures in the knobby bark glowed malevolently, betraying the heat within. We knew we had to flee. The campsite was all set up at the edge of the old forest on the eastern hill outside the city…

The weekly geek show was going to be taped live in what looked like an area part gymnasium, part library reading room beneath a mezzanine. There wasn’t much of an audience, and I sat near a blond girl who was taping it. Each panel member had their own microphone at the decorated table they were seated at. I don’t remember what they talked about, really. I do remember feeling compelled to comment once in a while, which earned me some dirty looks from the girl taping. Later, I found myself trying to keep up with someone, seeking the building exit, getting lost in crowded kitchens and supply rooms.

“The stars, the stars, oh my god the stars.” Said flat and awe-struck, devotional terrified at the non-verbal message known in that upward-glancing moment. Thousands, millions, like Pan’s dark colanders under which we’re kept like insects to be peeked at and tittered over. The sky suddenly exposing itself in this manner like never before, as if someone simply turned the volume up on the night. The moon zooming in on the earth as if to crash into it, nothing happened. A certain sense of disappointment over the coming doom ruining a recent change in bedrooms and the subsequent comfort attained by the move. Time travel. Dark suburban neighborhood.

Hat similar to pictured but dark maroon with very little embellishment and with 3 long dull silver pins with mysteriously important symbols on them to hold it in place. To attain it, I pressed the nose on the bust of a dead person on which the hat was being displayed, who spoke on my behalf to the person who had to give it to me. I desired it in order to pursue an affair with strange man (it seems we were together before space/time travel for I was confident that he and I had been and were indeed meant to be). I persued him through a giant confusing house party, rooms upon rooms of exhausted party-goers of all types, a true everyman’s soiree. Standing out back of the house, watching pieces of fully intact space equipment that looked like massive scaffolding constructions fall with obscene, slothful ignorance of gravity’s 32 feet per second rule. Then fleeing, seeking shelter from the madness and physical upheaval. Running, but later (with no transition or preamble) swimming to a large old sailing ship, getting aboard and collapsing at the desired man’s feet to lavish praise on him only to be scolded for weakness. Fighting the tempestuous waves in the boat, a large glass half-circle reveals the boat is completely overturned, but righted again, several times, which happens only in the context of what happens outside. Aside from severe rocking, people inside the boat are never thrown between floor and ceiling. Rockets rain down from the sky, attacking the boat. We’d almost made it through the storm but that assault was too much. We came back to shore. Afterward is all murky.

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Bullshittin’ With Sketch: Interview with Jeffery Nothing of Mushroomhead

Sketch E Whiteface — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 20:57:28 +0000

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Part 1 of the Mushroomhead Interview, for part 2, see the bottom of the post

Good evening children, I come to you yet again blathering however it’s not complete nonsense, this one actually has some thought behind it that doesn’t involve tearing out the asshole of a pop culture icon (since most of the opening acts nobody knows.) A couple weeks ago I contacted Sir Jeffery Nothing from the masked Ohio metal band Mushroomhead for two purposes — for him to take a small part in my short film, and to do an interview promoting their new DVD Mushroomhead, Vol. 2
due out October 28th. And instead of saying “Ew, no, queer. Hurry up, the wife’s coming home soon,” he said that he would take part. The interview was a concept that came later, I figured since the segment for the film wouldn’t take very long (recorded two shots collectively spanning just under 10 minutes) why not a little bump for something they got coming out. Plus I have my system all worked out where this time I can actually interview him on camera and publish the footage. I had interviewed him about a year and half before at their show in Portland, Maine but I couldn’t extract the footage from the DVD where I burned it. Now I can do it but damn it takes a long time.

So I truck out an hour and a half away from home for day two of the Rock & Shock Festival, a three day event that compiles two things that work together beautifully — balls to the wall metal and pure unadulterated violence. The headlining acts for the second day were Mushroomhead (who got second billing, they were on before the main act) and Gwar. However before they took stage I realized something, opening acts are kinda like sex — in that you start out dry jerking, then next time you do it with lube, then you cum, then head, go through a couple skanks just to grease the wheels further and then finally you’re in a broom closet with Heidi Klum or Margaret Cho because you’ve had about six scotches and can barely operate without causing harm to yourself. The first band was a complete scream band, basically taking heavy double-bass drums and doing a shitty Dr. Claw impersonation to it. Second band was a bit better, still in the vein of screaming surpassing actual music all while the vocalist had a very Vince Neil/Nikki Sixx rip-off kinda hair-do. Let this be a lesson to you kids, an aggressive voice isn’t the focal point when it comes to metal music. Any 14 year-old girl with a vocal box can make that guttural sound no problem, but those who can balance between that and singing, more respect to them than anything.

Skip a band or two later a band called Kingdom of Sorrow takes over which is more or less a super-group featuring a bassist who did a tour with Black Label Society, a guitarist from Type O Negative, and I believe the vocalist from Hatebreed with two other guys. In comparison to the acts before Mushroomhead and Gwar these guys were actually good since they did balance the music well, the vocals were mostly screams but they were coherent and had a range in sounds. Also one thing I tip my hat to about them was the fact that the vocalist had showmanship, interacted with the crowd whereas the prior acts were like, “Fuck it, we only get 30 minutes and you probably won’t remember our names after because we didn’t actually say it.” Now the band that went on before Mushroomhead and after Kingdom of Sorrow, I gotta tell you, FUCKING SUCKED!! Imagine if you will a skinny Hot Topic kid with gauges, skin tight clothing over his skeleton-like body, and nose length hair dancing like a constipated gorilla while screaming high pitched sounds that would make a bat want to slit it’s wings open and attempt to fly through the air with the wind gliding into the wound so as to nose dive into a vat of salt, all of which is considered a blessing than to rather listen to one of Suicide Silence’s “songs.” (Damn, that was verbose.) I had never heard them before then and I don’t intended to listen to them ever again unless I’m getting a full frontal lobotomy without anesthesia, in which case I’ll blast that shit that way it numbs my brain right up. To those of you who liked Suicide Silence, please consult an abortionist immediately for your future hell spawn just to cover yourself.

Half hour after the sonic rapists leave the stage Mushroomhead takes a hold of The Palladium, which from where I was premium. For those who have never been to The Palladium, let me give you a lay of the land. Imagine the store from Empire Records if it was slightly more broken down, featured a bar and was retrofitted as a theater. So it has a very interesting design which given the event seems both juxtaposed and also disturbingly appropriate. If it were being filmed for a DVD I’d almost think that David Fincher was making it since it has quite the similar tones to it’s lighting and architecture. Prior to Mushroomhead taking the stage I went to see them across the street at the DCU center where the other half of the Rock & Shock event took place, with many booths with lovely schwag such as bootleg DVDs (there wasn’t a single DVD that didn’t look like a bootleg), shirts, patches (I picked up a Stark Industries patch, one for S.H.I.E.L.D. and one for Blue Sun which is featured in the realm of Firefly and Serenity), and anything your heart could desire. They were there at 7:00 to do a signing for fans, and hearing about it I jumped right into line and managed to make it back to the venue with time to spare. For things to get autographed I brought a poster I made almost a year or two ago which has the members of the band rotoscoped and they all loved it. One of the singers, Waylon, virtually froze upon seeing it he liked it. If it weren’t for the contacts he was wearing I would’ve thought his eyes went white naturally. Got a couple pictures from the signing, some schwag then cut back to two and half hours later they take charge of the stage.

This is the third time I’ve seen Mushroomhead perform live, first in late October of ’06 at Mark’s Show Place near Manchester, NH, then in February ’07 at The Station in Portland, ME. Both really small venues and both purely great shows. As I told Jeff in our first interview in Portland, they’re a band who can make a closet-sized place like The Station (which it very much was) and make it seem as if the crowd was never-ending. This time it was almost the opposite, while the venue was considerably larger than the previous two it actually felt a whole lot smaller. Maybe due to the mass chaos and six foot males gently gliding near my head toward the stage. Starting off with a heavy hitter “12 Hundred” the audience is immediately whipped into a frenzy as the band creates fire and sweat while they play. Shortly before Jeffery Nothing’s part kicks in he arrives on stage with a new type of make-up that is a hybrid of his long-going outfit known as The Butcher with this Butcher-Devil-Heath Ledger Joker type of deal. And it looked gorgeous. Periodically throughout the show I would watch Jeff virtually transform himself into the character he was on stage, as if he was channeling the presence of Ledger’s Joker through him. As I said, it was pure serenity. And with the benefits of a larger venue come little games like stage diving and moshing, both which took place from the crowd and members of the band. They did a couple songs I’ve never heard them play live such as “Xeroxed” and their cover of “When Doves Cry” by Prince. Closing out with “Solitaire Unraveling” the show was an overall powerhouse as expected. Unfortunately I didn’t get to see Gwar (probably good because from my understanding everyone in the crowd got spewed with movie blood and fake semen. Yummy.) After I got out me and my co-conspirator Some Guy Named Al trekked over to the bus area, interviewed Jeff and filmed his segment for my short film. The events that unfolded from the interview follow in the video below. The events from the film will come later. Enjoy, and until next time, I’m Sketch E Whiteface reminding you to control the overpopulation, kick a skater in the balls.

=Sketch/Ed

Mushroomhead signing at the DCU Center

Mushroomhead autographing my self-made poster. They loved it.

Screen capture from my interview with Jeffery Nothing. There are several moments like this. Not sure what we were looking at.

Jeffery Nothing in a promo pic for the upcoming short "This Side Up: Omerganite."

Part 2 of the Mushroomhead Interview

PART I
PART II

MISC LINKS

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Cigarette Burns – A Tear Into weirdHolly

Sketch E Whiteface — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 01:29:16 +0000

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If someone reliable could tell me when in the future films would become solely based on finances it’d certainly save me the hassle of looking up articles on the Internet. If someone told me it would be next week I wouldn’t be shocked in the least since in it’s current state it’s just about at the point where it’s not about telling a story but a good way to rope in a few thousand people and scam them out of $10 because Will Smith pretends to act (I’ll get into that in just a moment.) As an up and coming independent film maker I have many issues of how things are dealt with in Hollyweird. To rattle of several quick ones — planning sequels months prior to the film’s release (it’s a half-cocked gesture mostly from the studios and regardless of how good you think it is or how profitable you believe it will become you must keep in mind the judgment of the public will have the real say), the MPAA and their rating system and advertising standards, 20th Century Fox (I’ll get into them later as well), studios pushing for PG-13 ratings for a wider audience (I don’t care what educational background you have but to try and make “Punisher: War Zone” PG-13 because “The Dark Knight” conveniently was and made a shit-ton of money doesn’t make it just. How can you make a man’s head exploding soft-core?), and painful “actors”. Let’s break it down, kids.

In case you haven’t noticed that for the last several years 20th Century Fox has prowled on modern celluloid like a drunk man in a bar or a 13 year-old white kid from Iowa who thinks he’s black, they think showing their cock will win affection. Wrong. Lately they’ve really been pouring gas on themselves. The bigger stunt recently is their lawsuit against Warner Bros. over upcoming comic book movie “Watchmen”. The studio claimed that Warner Bros. didn’t hold the rights to make the Alan Moore graphic novel or at least distribute the picture, never minding the fact that Warner Bros. owns DC Comics/Vertigo for which the graphic novel resides on. So now they are currently in a legal battle to do either one of two things — make it so that Fox is the distributor (which can only mean they will ghastly edit the movie into a mind-numbing 90-minute feature that contains only the parts where there is fighting and shit blowing up with no intellectual transition) or to completely wipe the movie’s release date off the calendar completely, never releasing it. Though luckily given that the justice system moves about as fast as tree sap downhill in the winter the trial may not actually begin until January of 2009, a mere two months before it’s slated release date. Given that Fox has a tendency to shoot their wad like they know what they’re doing chances are (this is at least wishful thinking) the case will rule in Warner Bros.’s favor.

Another valid point that Fox has no idea what they are doing to tell a story visually is going around the creators to have it your way. This is unprofessional and also a dick move. One instance stated in the following article is on the upcoming “X-Men Origins: Wolverine” which tells the tale of how Wolverine came to be (Weapon X program, scrapes with Sabertooth, etc.) and needless to say a very dark tale which requires seemingly dark environments. One such environment was changed without the director’s knowledge. What called for something “dark, dinghy and somber” was changed to something less depressing with lighter colors and cleaner textures. Now if in the correct fashion this can work in favor but unless you’re doing some “One Hour Photo”/”American Psycho” clean-looking thriller then you are a pussy of a film maker. Changing a set’s design to something more cheery (a colorful euphemism) is almost a denial of reality itself, thinking it can’t be this dark and disgusting when in truth it can be because it fucking is! You can’t cover a bald Kevin Spacey in Laffy Taffy and believe he just killed Brad Pitt’s girlfriend (if you can, please lower your dosage.)

Changing lanes here — YOU CAN’T PUT WILL SMITH IN EVERYTHING! Okay, chances are I’m blaspheming here but you know what I have to say this, why should I really give a shit about a movie because Will Smith is in it? Because conveniently 98% of the movies he’s done have raked in billions? Will Smith isn’t that fantastic an actor. His barometer for character ranges from a good guy who says “fuck” a lot to a good guy who doesn’t say “fuck” at all. Occasionally he’ll mix it up and have the good guy be a bit of a dick or an arrogant douche but for the love of God just knock it off. It doesn’t matter how fantastic he seems you can’t cast him as “The Karate Kid” or Captain America, it’s wrong on every level imaginable to the sane. If I could ever afford his salary for a movie I’d have him play a serial killer who hardly speaks just to break the mold, and when he does speak it’s in a strange language. To help illustrate my point, whenever I see a movie that has Will Smith in it I know it’s Will Smith, I can’t believe he’s anyone else. I can believe Christian Bale as Bruce Wayne and Trent Reznik, I can believe Josh Hartnett as Slevin Kelevra and The Salesman, but you throw Will Smith into a role I’m gonna know it’s him regardless. Captain Hillard, Muhammad Ali, Jesus Christ, I’ll only think, “Oh, hey, Will Smith.” You may think I’m daft for uttering or even thinking such a thing but I’ve heard a similar tear about Christopher Walken and look at his fucking acting skills. (Inside joke: 111th biopic on Andy Warhol starring Chris Walken.)

A couple other mini-rants. If you’ve never been to Massachusetts or talked to someone from there for more than 20 minutes then it’s news to you that often people from their have a habit of shooting their mouth off. Mark Wahlberg is from Massachusetts, so for him saying that Max Payne could take down Batman in hand-to-hand combat makes sense coming from him but is ghastly offensive to the point where if I saw him in a pub I would shatter the closest bottle near me and jab it into his eye socket. First of all the two characters are miles apart, Payne wants revenge for his wife’s death while Bruce Wayne/Batman wants justice for them and others. And also dropping the obvious factor to play in, he’s fucking Batman. Imagine if you will a man standing before an expert martial artist who is performing a series of moves for intimidation and Joe Guy takes him down by jabbing him in the throat. And in the interview where he made this claim he mentioned it was strictly in the matter of fisticuffs, not the box office which shows even more delusion since if you’ve seen any previews for “Max Payne” you’d know that Fox has ruined another video game on the big screen. Well kids I’m putting out the ashes for now. My next piece will detail the new releases of Metallica’s “Death Magnetic” and Nine Inch Nails’ “The Slip”, and how the two contrast each other. See you on the other side, keep it sketchy.

=Sketch/Ed

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Holy Stale Popcorn Batman! MST3K Box Set Coming!

Giania — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 14:59:27 +0000

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Perusing through my feeds this morning, as I am wont to do, I discovered a blurb in Wired’s The Underwire about the whole MST3K crew putting in an appearance at this year’s Comic Con! Not only that, but they plan to do a live Rifftrax session of Plan 9 From Outer Space as well.

Then the part that really grabbed me (because I can’t attend Comic Con this year), the announcement of an MST3K boxed set! SQEEEE! It’s currently up for pre-order on Amazon, with a listed release date of October 28th of this year. According to the Underwire article, legal issues have prevented Shout Factory from releasing the list of episodes that will be available in this set. With 4 discs in the set, my hope is they get as many as possible or at least all the ones not covered by the currently available DVD collections.

I’m hoping for Sidehackers, some of the Godzilla movies, Castle of Fu-Manchu (which I own a copy of in non-MST3K format), and Time Chasers. (“Wheee we’re getting poison sumac wheeee!”)

Burning Questions:
What episodes are your favorites?
Joel or Mike Nelson?
Tom or Crow?
The Doctor or Pearl?
TV’s Frank?